Piano exam results came out on wed.. Was having exco meeting at that time when i received a msg from my teacher.. let's just say im totally disappointed in myself.. i know alot of people have been telling me that i should be contented with my results after having skipped from grade1 to 5.. and the last time i took my exam was like 14 years ago? but the thing is that one of the things that pulled me down was my scales.. which is something i could really practise hard on.. but i lost it to myself this time round.. just simply too lazy to practise my scales.. totally disliked them right from the start.. and so i got a 118, which is like 2 marks away from 120, a merit? im not sure what are my teachers' expectations.. though it seemed like she's contented with my results cos she actually wanted me to take grade4 instead of grade5 this time round.. but! 2 marks! sighs~ ):

taking my grade5 theory soon.. though im still contemplating if i should just switch over to pop right after that.. feel that it'll be more practical for my club.. and if i wanted to challenge myself, i could probably serve in the worship ministry.. but for classical.. if im gonna learn all the way up to diploma but not teach, it's gonna be kinda wasted, i feel..

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havent been catching up on Jinglun's news after i heard that he's out.. totally sian.. dont even wanna watch the next few episodes already.. so i guess i wont be posting anymore videos.. haha. im just not the type who will wanna find out what went wrong.. so what if we discuss bout it.. the results are not within our control..

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cell last night was really an eye-opener.. lots of conflicting views from different people.. im alright with discussions.. but it got quite aggressive towards the end.. and it's not that it's not correct.. but that evoked some of my negative emotions too.. something which i wished did not happen.. i certainly did not enjoy the way opinions were brought forth.. lots of info.. and to add on, aggression.. agitated people.. it's not sthg i would enjoy.. was kinda worried throughout the whole thing.. felt kinda guilty for not speaking up.. it's not about which side im supporting.. if a bunch of people had their own individual views, and they were supporting themselves, it was still okay.. but not when they come together, combine strength and try to knock the party on the other side over.. anyway, all these are just my personal feelings.. as much as i hate to admit, i still have to.. this was how i felt last night..

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im just quite glad i didnt had, or rather, i've no reason to have, high hopes this time round.. im not even angry or sad seriously.. maybe just a little disappointed.. most importantly, i feel that the sincerity wasnt there.. cos you went back on your words.. it's just how much you value a person.. and how responsible you are for your actions and your words.. i kinda expected it to happen actually.. and im quite glad my instincts were right..

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一年了。去年去 foc 的时候，我们还有在传简讯。原本以为我会很快把一个人忘了，但却并非如此。原来我是那么重感情的一个人？ 哈哈。现在，真的要把简讯一个一个地删除掉了。也不知道为什么会一直把简讯留着。偶尔看一看，还会回想起当时的情况，对着手机笨笨地笑！你曾经让我快乐，也曾经让我不知所措。其实，你还真的蛮厉害的。哈哈。最后想说的是，你真的真的应该感到很荣幸，因为你曾经让我为你感到难过，甚至为你流泪！可以让我为他哭泣的人真的很少。哈哈。好了，就算我臭美好了！

谢谢你曾住在我心里。(:

回忆总是美好的。就在这里，为一切写下休止符吧...